“Maybe,” I reply. “How much for a dozen?”
“I’m looking for 50 rate, give or take,” he says.
Oh boy; Fed frowns on using unsanctioned currency!
“I don’t have a bet. How many dollars?”
“Sorry, dollar is too risky. I am not a licensed seller. Too many questions from the Fed; they are just looking for an excuse to carpet pull me. Even if they don’t, I can’t afford the 20% peer-to-peer tax they take from the transaction. Bitcoin is better; it is not subject to central bank duty.”
I turn away to consider my options; I bet the FedGov would be interested to know about this tax evader…but my iGlass suddenly shows an alert outlining the face of a woman who just walked by.
A message scrolls across my field of vision:
“GUARANTEE UNPLACED: $50,000 REWARD.
“Carla Jennings Wanted by Fed for Participating in Black Market Exchange.”
My heart rate increases. That much money would provide a financial cushion and might even be enough for a deposit on a pod with a full kitchen. Best not to think too hard about the philosophical dilemma; while Carla has not caused me direct harm, she is working against the public by selfishly ignoring the directives of the Fed.
“Accept the gig,” I reply with a sigh.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but I need you to come with me,” I say as I fish a few ties out of my pocket. She frolics.
“Stop right there!” I shout and take up the hunt. She’s faster than me because I avoid stepping on the FedGov sidewalks; every step is logged and microtransaction fees are deducted from your Fed account in real time.
As I’m about to lose sight of my quarry, I do some quick mental math and decide that the toll expense is worth the potential reward. I finally catch up and tackle her on Market Street. I look around to see if anyone is within earshot.
“Give up,” I whisper.
“Damn you,” she spits back. I have to take control of the situation, so I put the zippers around her wrists. She lets out a furious scream as I search for her belongings.
“What do we have here?” I exclaim as I pull a thumb sized circuit board out of her bag.
“Please don’t. It’s my only savings that’s safe from the Fed!”
“Bitcoin, huh? I sure could have used a little bet earlier. Alas, the Feds already know I’ve arrested you. Agents will be here in a minute. They’re going to force you to unlock this unauthorized wallet.”
I can see the panic in her eyes – she knows what would happen if the Feds don’t get access to her private keys. Years of work in the data mines for her to pay off the fines. Oh, the irony.
But I have to stay strong for our struggling economy; little else matters to the Fed other than pumping out good money in these tough times. Despite it being against my own interest, I have little choice but to continue accepting assignments to crack down on cryptocurrency so it can be removed from circulation.
Muttering to myself, I hand Carla over to the Fed agents and see the bounty credited to my account. She sobs and struggles as they drag her away. Still, I steel myself and imagine the suffering that can occur when society tries to operate without a stable centralized financial system. We are all in this together; there is no room for selfishness.
As I walk home along a winding path to avoid as many FedGov sidewalks as possible, I reflect on how the world has changed over the decades. It’s hard to believe that this area was once the cradle of the Cypherpunk movement that spawned cryptocurrency and strong anti-Fed sentiment.
The winds of change left those ideals behind, and FedGov loyalists now control every aspect of society. Privacy and sovereignty are nothing but a distant memory. The FedGov has an anti-privacy mandate, banning all software and hardware that facilitates cryptocurrency and secure messaging. Even those who still cling to the past find it difficult to avoid being tracked by the dense web of sensors embedded in every technology product, every store, every home, every street.
Today’s concert won’t change my life, but at least it will give me the money to buy new clothes. I have to be content to daydream that my federal lottery will win this month and my Universal Basic Income will be upgraded to Individual Comfort Plus Income…
This is a guest post by Jameson Lopp. Opinions expressed are entirely their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of BTC Inc or Bitcoin Magazine.
